Faith

Hello!!

So I'm not going to lie this was a really hard week. It just seemed like nothing was going right. No one was keeping their appointments with us, the 2 refferals we had weren't interested, and we bascially have no investigators and no one to teach so we were visiting a lot of less actives but most of them are not that willing to change. Also I think the "greenie fire" that I had from being a new missionary finally kind of wore off and I realized that being a missionary is hard!! I can honestly say that I have never tried so hard at something in my entire life, all day everyday no matter what the results are. Sister Reinsch and I were feeling really discouraged and we had a few moments where we were like "I honestly don't want to go out today because I'm tired of trying so hard." But thank goodness for awesome district leaders and zone leaders!!! Since we were discouraged we weren't trying as hard in our work and so things really weren't moving forward which got us more discouraged. So since we didn't know what to do we called our zone leaders and were like "Help us! We feel like nothing we are doing is working and we feel really confused and unsure about what more we can do." They talked us through it and we realized that being discouraged and not wanting to work was because we weren't having faith. Sometimes I really hate knocking since we're lucky if someone listens to us and if they do listen we're lucky if they want to meet with us again. But as a missionary its not about what you feel like doing its about doing what you have to do. Showing the Lord that you are willing to do everything there is to find the people he has prepared. I feel like so far I have had a lot of faith and have been trying to rely on the Lord to guide us and to help us in the work. But after this week and letting the discouragement get to me I feel like I am starting all over and having to rebuild my faith again. We met with the zone leaders and they talked to us about how we can develop the faith to find. We need to do more in order to find more people because right now we have no one to teach. We need to put all of our efforts into finding. We also talked to our district leader and he said that he has had these kinds of weeks before. But surprisingly the answer for not wanting to work is to work! You have to show the Lord that you are willing to do everything he asks you in order to find people and to be blessed in your efforts. So we are doing a lot better and I am really trying to have faith (its just a lot easier said than done). Also we got to participate in a blitz this week which was exciting!! Some of the sisters in our zone have been having a really hard time in their area particularly in finding (sounds familiar . . but it wasn't us). Anyways so what a blitz is is that all of the missionaries in the zone get together and we each take a section of these sister's area and for one arfternoon all of us go and knock and contact in their area. We contacted a few people so hopefully they find someone to teach soon! So ya this has been a really long week and honestly I am just trying to forget it and move on and do better this week. I have been reading in the scriptures in Mosiah and I love the story of the people of Alma. They were in bondage to the Lamanites and were persecuted, mocked, and smitten. But through it all they had amazing faith. They relied on the Lord and prayed to him for strength and comfort. Because of their faith their burdens were made light and they were able to endure their trials with patience and cheerfulness. This story is amazing to me!! When hard things happen it can be really hard to be cheerful and try to endure patiently (for example this week). But I know that things always work out better when we turn to the Lord for strength. He never leaves us alone even when we feel like things aren't working out the way they should. He knows exactly what we are going through and he knows perfectly how to help us and comfort us. We put pictures on our planners and this transfer the front of mine has a picture of Christ with a quote by Neal A Maxwell. The quote says "I testify that Jesus is the perfect example and leader, not asking us to do what He has not done, not asking us to endure what He has not endured, giving us enough, but not more than we can manage." Christ knows we can endure those hard weeks! He knows how it feels to be discouraged and to not have anyone listen to you and to feel like what you are doing isn't making that big of a difference. And if we have faith in him we will be able to see that we really are doing his work and we are making a difference even though it might just be small moments or we might be doing things where we can't see the effects right away. So stay tuned because this week is going to be awesome and miracles are going to happen!!! Hurrah for Israel!!

Love,

Sister Washburn